Jenny Slate On Emotional Journey To First Emmy Nomination For ‘Dying For Sex’: “I Knew Enough About Myself To Let It All Go”

On Emmy nomination morning, Dying for Sex star Jenny Slate was working up a sweat for totally normal reasons. In speaking with Deadline, the actor, nominated for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Limited or Anthology Series or Movie, shared that she had forgotten about the special day once she became immersed in her daily life with her daughter in tow. It wasn’t until after a yoga mat workout that she eventually checked her phone to find “many text messages rolling in.” Slate says, “Because I’m me, my first thought was that somebody in my family had some sort of accident, but in fact it was something really good.” 

Based on the successful Wondery podcast of the same name, Dying For Sex follows the story of Molly Kochan (Michelle Williams), a woman diagnosed with stage IV metastatic breast cancer who leaves her husband of 15 years to explore her sexuality. She gets the courage and support to go on this journey from her best friend Nikki Boyer (Slate), who also agrees to be Molly’s caretaker. The series centers on the emotional strength of these two friends and the people who love Molly as she faces death. 

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In addition to Slate’s first Emmy Award recognition, Dying for Sex also landed eight other nominations, including Outstanding Lead Actress in a Limited or Anthology Series or Movie for Michelle Williams, Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Limited or Anthology Series or Movie for Rob Delaney and Outstanding Writing for a Limited or Anthology Series or Movie. 

“I think people are responding to the genuine connections of love, trust, joy and sorrow that these characters have,” Slate says about the response to the show. “I also think that the show is really focused on not turning away from things that might hurt you. And bypassing singular definitions of ourselves and of other people. I think you watch Molly, it’s her story, but the show is really concerned with how other people are living around her. And by showing Nikki’s life, you show Molly’s life as well because we are all enriched by each other’s experiences. This show makes everybody matter, while also putting Molly’s trauma at the center of a gigantic, beautiful transformation, rather than pulling her down into the depths. I think people feel hopeful because of that.” 

Slate continues, “I also just think Liz [Meriwether] and Kim [Rosenstock] did such a great job of allowing us to wear all those emotions easily, even though there are such grave, important and heartbreaking and heart exploding scenes in the show. I appreciate that the script felt so good to read and that the show felt so good to be a part of. Even a year after the filming ended, I am still gaining perspective and growth because I was connected to that story.” 

Not afraid of being vulnerable in the public eye through her visceral comedy specials and personal essay books, Slate reflected on how those experiences helped her relate to Nikki’s character. “What I started to understand about myself is that I want to do performances or create work in writing or standup that includes all of the different variations of the human experience that I have been a part of. So, that’s already in my own personally created work. But then, when it comes to a role like Nikki in Dying for Sex, what helped me was my appetite for acceptance of variation for dissonance; for unlikely combinations as part of a worthy and functional whole,” Slate continues. “I’m really drawn toward intensity, as long as it feels real and true. It doesn’t matter if it’s sort of switching between comedy or drama or whatever, that place is in between. I felt like I knew enough about myself to let it all go and just connect with the incredible actors I had the honor of working with, as well as this beautiful story and exceptional script that Liz and Kim wrote. Also, being able to draw from Nikki Boyer’s experience, there was so much for me to work with. I went in doing enough of my own personal writing, standup performing, and living as a human to know myself much better than I had ever known myself before. And that all really helped me connect to Nikki as a character.”

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